Christmas Day 2018. I feel "down." Christmas really has never been the same for me since Ray died. This was his FAVORITE time of the year. This is also the anniversary of his last days on earth. Memories of his decline in health over the next couple weeks flood my soul. The next couple weeks are going to be really hard on me. You would think nine years would erase the pain, but it doesn't. Some of my "pain" may also be that I watch as Drew slowly declines due to his Huntington's Disease. It makes me sad. He expresses no emotions so he's hard to "read."
This is also the second Christmas without my mom. Although we hadn't spent Christmas together in years, she was always there for me. A quick phone call away. We talked every single day. Sometimes several times a day. I would call her about the dumbest things and apologize, but she always told me she wanted me to share all those things with her.
So, I'm kind of down this Christmas. - Jimmy
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