Happy Birthday Raymond P. Riker, III

Well, it’s been a while.  But, it’s a perfect day to post in my Blog.  Today is Ray’s birthday.  He would have been a young 56 year old man!  Of course I miss him as much today and I did at 9:10pm on January 3.  The wounds have scarred over though.  I still see them, but they are not as noticeable. 

I came across this great list of “30 Things to Do Before You Die.”  I found it on the website mindbodygreen.com .  This is not your traditional “bucket list” – but it’s a bucket list I think everyone needs to achieve.  Check it out below:

30 Things To Do Before You Die:
1. Stop worrying about debt.
2. Forgive your ex-lovers.
3. Stop trying to control your outcome.
4. Look in the mirror and love yourself unconditionally.
5. Leave the job you hate.
6. Find your purpose and live it full heartedly.
7. Adopt a furry friend.
8. Don't feel guilty for holiday weight gain.
9. Trust that everything is in right order.
10. Travel to the place you keep thinking about.
11. Try something that scares you daily.
12. Be open to change.
13. Let go of your past.
14. Stop trying to change people.
15. Stop looking for answers outside of yourself.
16. Stop thinking you did something wrong.
17. Be your weird, crazy, beautiful self.
18. Follow your heart.
19. Risk everything for love.
20. Reject rejection.
21. See the world as a beautiful, safe, and loving place.
22. See everyone as equals.
23. Give up all attachments to stuff.
24. Recognize the journey is the reward.
25. Stay hopeful and optimistic in difficult situations.
26. Welcome all life lessons.
27. See the opportunities in every challenge rather than give up.
28. Live your values.
29. Inspire others by your own bigness.
30. Play with the world.

Sounds easy, but this is really tough stuff!   We are very emotional beings, and at a certain age we are set in our ways.  Sometimes it takes a real life change to rethink how you live. 

For me, even after 5 years, I am still figuring out how my life should “be.”  I met Ray at such a young age that we built our life to be what it was over a 21 year period.  That all changed in the blink of an eye.  At 47 I am now still restarting who I am…and it’s very difficult.  Everything I/we dreamed of our life after retirement has vanished.  I don’t even think I will ever be able to retire now. 

I will do what I can to accept my changes and I think these 30 bucket list items can help in that.  Happy Birthday Raymond Riker, III.  I love you!  - Jimmy