It's Thursday....already! The week flies by. I made "snowball cookies" (aka: butterball cookies) yesterday and a Dobos Torte. Every Christmas my grandmother would make at least a dozen Dobos Tortes. This is an eleven layer cake, originally made in Hungary. Hungary is close to Austria so the desert carried over to there. My grandfather was from Austria, so that must be the source for my grandmother's inspiration. I am going to make another one today for my mom. Marguerite is going to Detroit on Saturday, so she said she would deliver it to my mom.
Cold outside, and only in the 20's today. It really is pretty outside with all the snow. However, in two months I am sure I will be writing about how sick and tired I am of it. However, I have a wonderful 10 day cruise in March/April that I can look forward to.
I feel great today. I see a great big light at the end of the tunnel. A door has opened and I am walking right in. I've held back for a couple months, but it seems right. Yes, I am talking about "dating." I've talked in length about it with my grief counselor and she has given me great insight. It is a long distance "relationship" right now and I think that is good for me. I can take it slow. His name is Drew, he lives in Chicago and I've actually known him for five years. He has stayed here with a group of friends over the years so he knew Ray...which makes it a plus. Otherwise he would be sick and tired of me constantly talking about "Ray."
Back in January, February, March, April, May (and even June) I never, EVER would have thought I could feel like I do now. I am starting to feel normal. Actually NORMAL! It's been a long road, because I've had to start a new life. Yesterday I said to Marguerite that I wished Ray was back and everything was back to the way is WAS. Then I said...it can't, it never will be, that is the reality...I have to move on. I think I have accepted the fact that I do have a new life. I have to embrace it. I have no choice. And, I can accept that fact. - Jimmy
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